The Chocolate Lady

Saturday, October 6, 2007

Welcome to the neighborhood

The other day at the neighborhood pool, while Pooper was having swim team practice, I saw my friend, oh, let's just call her, "Jane" for the sake of anonymity.

And, can I just add, the community pool seems to be the place for all the action lately...

anyways....Jane comes strolling up to sit and chat, as her own daughter was also swimming, and I noticed her shirt.



"uh, nice shirt Jane." was all I could muster, as my jaw gapped open and my eyes kept blinking, certain that the image wasnt registering correctly in my brain.

"oh thanks" she said, in her happy-go-lucky tone. That's the thing about Jane, she is so down to earth, so unpretentious, so real....but perhaps a little TOO REAL, I mean, the shirt, come on, Jane!

I then mentioned that I hadnt realized she was SUCH a free spirit, and, even if she was, did the whole pool need to know it? I realize that the Olympic swim coach is quite handsome, but was this really the appropriate manner in which to make a move, and in front of the kids???

She looked down at her shirt, in total shock (real or fake? who knows) and said, "I never even noticed what was on this shirt! I got it for $6 at an Old Navy outlet, I saw the rack '$6' and I just took a shirt, I didnt look."

Really? The giant 69 across your chest, and you never noticed? Did, say, your husband notice? or perhaps did YOU notice that people at your kids' school, or the market or somewhere might have been staring at you?

Jane acted so shy and embarassed, most of the time, but I did catch her winking at the Olympic swim coach, so, Im not sure I am buying her story at. all.

But this is what I am bombarded with around my neighborhood, perverted old men literally sitting on the edge of their seat trying to land a "date" and now even other moms out prowling at the community pool. The sexual stuff is just overflowing around these parts, It makes me totally see why people run off and become amish, and live in communes, separating themselves from the Janes, I mean, Jezebels of the world.

Of course now when I see Jane, she always makes a point of bringing up "Bible Study" and stuff. Hopefully Jesus can help her get her mind out of the gutter, or at least buy her a new wardrobe.

PS. Several people have mentioned that they are unable to leave comments, I have recently changed the settings so everyone should be able to post in the comments section.

4 comments:

Joanne said...

1969....it was a very good year! It was the year I graduated from high school. I, personally, would be proud to wear that t-shirt. Have Jane send it my way.

Joanne said...

on the poll, I think air conditioning is the best invention. Ask any menopausal woman and you will probably get the same answer...or at least a fan!!

The Traveling Yogi said...

Well, it does say "nineteen" above the "69". Maybe that year has some significance for her.

Briana

Anonymous said...

Hey,
You crack me up...as long as you don't start commenting on the crackpot TA's at Andrew's school...
Hope all is well with Elise and thanks for not backing over my kids today, in the parking lot.