The Chocolate Lady

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Christmas card photo saga, part 5

So, while I was getting Pooper dried off, and trying to prevent his catheter from getting contaminated (which truly would be life threatening), Beauty and the photographer were busy doing this....

Soon, the numbing cold became too much, and Beauty retreated to the blanket with Pooper. And, because Im all about being accurate (and stretching out my blogging time, so that I dont have to go find all the left socks in the laundry) I went and looked up the weather for this particular day, at the end of October, 2004, and saw that at the very hour that my kids were wet and naked on the beach, it was 63 degrees. And I dont want any big sighs from the east coast/mid west folks who are used to snowy winters, because, that is pretty cold for us Californians, especially when you are soaked in salt water, and the winds are blowing along the coast, AND, it's about to start pouring rain again, because we got 1.34 inches of rain that day!

And if we were normal, this would be the point when we packed up our naked kids and trekked up the wet and rocky cliff to go home. But why would we do that??? Apparently, everyone but me thought it was really funny that I was going to be charged hundreds of dollars for pictures of my kids, none of which was a horizontal shot of them holding hands with the water in the background, in color. NONE.

No, this whole episode was hilarious. So, rather than go home and get warm and protect your very life, why not just stay in the setting sun (with impending thunderclouds) and take a bunch of artsy pictures like this....

and how about some smooches like this......

and some funny faces like this.....

and this....

I would love to show you all of the pictures she took of my kids wrapped up and going into hypothermia, but it would probably crash your computer, because, she took a lot more pics. And, Id just like to point out, that there is hardly any sun left..notice the darkness and lessening shadows in the pictures, it's sunset people, and the rain clouds are almost overhead.

The nanny and I had packed everything up, including the wet clothes, and now it was time for someone to insert some sanity into the situation and bring the kids I come to get the kids, see my foot in the bottom right corner?? Here I come, let's go home now, this party is over!!!

"No, we want to stay here and freeze!"

and now Pooper is looking at me, realizing that it's finally time to get out of here. While the ever professional, photographer kept snapping pictures!!

I got the kids, and all of their wet clothes, and the nanny and I had to carry them up a difficult hike. And we got in the car.

The photographer seemed happy as ever, and let me know she would send me the proofs....

The thundering rainstorm began just as we were driving away, and poured down on us, and I wondered to the nanny if I would get a discount, since the kids ended up getting soaked, which was caused by the photographer's obsession with trying to get a reflective shot.

Fast forward a few weeks, when the proofs came. She took 3 rolls. One ENTIRE ROLL was in black and, no Christmas Card photo I had asked for color. There was also one ENTIRE ROLL, I KID YOU NOT! of my kids wet......a half dozen of Beauty in her birthday suit, and the rest of the roll of my kids wrapped in that darned blanket.

So, I had one roll left from which to scour the pictures for my Christmas Card photo. I had already selected my Christmas Cards...they required a horizontal card.....but there was not one horizontal card in the bunch that had the two kids together, facing the camera in any way. Not one!!

I was furious. This cost me hundreds of dollars!! I had contemplated spending this kind of money on pictures, and should have known better.

Our nanny was with me when the pictures arrived and we went through them together to try to find something to use with the Christmas cards.

"Was I not clear enough? Did she not get the horizontal thing? or that I wanted them in color? clothed? let alone the ocean in the background or anything like that....did she not hear me????"

My nanny replied, "I dont know how she wouldnt have heard you, I heard you many, many times, you told her what you wanted, and this just isnt it."

So, I called the photographer....

Me: Hi (name left out so I dont get sued), I got the pictures today.

Her: Oh, dont you just love them!!!!! (no question mark needed, as I dont think she was really asking me, I dont think she cared what I thought, this was all about her.)

Me: There are some precious pictures, however, Im disappointed that the ....Horizontal picture of the two of the, with the ocean in the background.....was never taken. And I already have my Christmas cards, and I made it clear to you what I was looking for to use for my Christmas picture, and I dont have one that will work.

Her: Out of all of those you dont have one to use?????

Me: Well, no. I have an entire roll in black and white, and I let you know I didnt want black and white, I wanted color. And I have a whole roll of the kids after they nearly drowned, and those wont work either. You are charging me for three rolls, and I only have one roll of color pictures of my kids in their MATCHING, EXPENSIVE outfits.

Her: Oh, I think they are such gorgeous pictures...I, I,

Me: There are some great pictures, but I was very clear about what I wanted, and it's not here.....

She ended up giving me a SLIGHT discount (one roll free)...which was still a rip-off to me.

And, her loss, because this year we did take the nice big picture to put up in the family room, and I didnt hire her to do it, because I knew, depsite her ability to snap pictures in all situations, she wouldnt get the shots that I wanted.

In the end, I found this picture, it was THE ONLY picture of the two holding hands smiling with the water in the background, dry and in color....and it was vertical, so I had to get different cards to send them out.... and I would have prefered not to have that giant clump of stinky sea weed.....

I doubt that anyone that saw this picture had a clue as to what went on that day. It looks like it was a warm summer day, all peaceful and calm, and perfect! HA!

and the saga doesnt end there....this was only 2004. I still have 2005, 2006, and let's not forget 2007 - which we (maybe) took last week...which was a disaster, and the impetus for this whole vent.

1 comment:

The Running Girl said...

If you have sagas for 2005, 2006 and 2007, this could take a while! Sounds like you need to take a photography class and do your own photos. Can't wait for the rest of the story.