How to make a man fall in love, or at least give you a rose

It’s time for, The Bachelor, which would be more appropriately named, “A man’s search for his circus freakshow side-kick.”

The 2007 Bachelor is a country guy from Texas, who owns a bar or two. Kind of rugged, kind of homey, but definitely cute enough to capture the attention of the 24 bachelorettes who will vie for his roses each week.

Clearly after so many seasons of this show, the girls have figured out that they need to STAND OUT, do something to get noticed, to get this prized man’s attention. Unfortunately, some gals chose some pretty hideous ways to make themselves shine. Some things seemed to work, and the girl was rewarded with a flower at the “rose ceremony” and some things, well, were apparently HUGE turn-offs, I mean, some of these girls are just really lacking in talent, social skills and judgement.

Here are a few highlights of the antics seen on the premiere episode: and let me just say, I wish I had a DVR, ,or at least had taken pictures of my tv, like bossy does , because these are SO MUCH better when you can SEE them. I even looked on youtube for some clips, and there were none (which suprises me), but anyhoo….you could always go check it out on abc online Here are some examples of what you could watch:

Kristy, the acupuncturist, Practiced her Chinese medicine techinique of “tongue reading” on Brad and YES, he seemed to be interested in this weirdo skill of hers, as she got a rose.

Hillary broke her face on a bowling ball, however she is gorgeous to look at (plastic surgery???) whether fake or natural, he liked how she looks and she did get a rose.

Juli, Got on the ground, in her bright blue gown, and put her legs up behind her head, like a pretzel- and even admitted, that she showed this talent off, in an attempt to get the “first impression” rose – I think she forgot that the first impression should actually be a *good* impression, not the impression that scares him the most, because she not only didn’t get THAT rose, she didn’t get one at all and was sent home.

Tauni, wanted to “bust a special move” for Brad, and so she bent over, and stuck her REAR in his face, no lie, and rocked it back and forth, IN HIS FACE, Um Hello Tauni, FLAVOR OF LOVE is filming across the street sweetheart – NO ROSE for Tauni!

Melissa, who was completely wasted, dropped her fake, rubber boob on the floor….and later want on to tell Brad that he was, “sweet….sweet……SWEETNESS”, well, her sweet self went home, roseless.

Morgan, pulled of her “signature move” –honest, she called it that – and put her WEBBED FOOT up on the table to show off to the Bachelor. – Can you guess? NO ROSE.

Mallory chose to spend her 1:1 time in the pool, however, Brad was not in the pool, he was in a tux, surrounded by the other ladies in cocktail/formal dresses…..might have been wise to spend her one-on-one time with him, but in the end, it didn’t matter, the “mermaid from afar” technique was effective and YES, she got a rose.

Jenny did some go-go dancing, and DID get the first impression rose

Lindsey gave BRAD a rose, and then sang a song about the “yellow rose in Texas”….point taken, but the girl could NOT sing. – her sentimental move got her a rose though. Maybe Brad is tone deaf?

It proves to be an interesting show this year, with lots of *special* ladies. Im excited to see all the things they do to try to win Brad's heart, and wonder who will win his hand in the end. Any guesses??

Im for sale

If you glance over the right hand side of the page, you'll notice some ads. That's right, Im pimping out my blog. Im working on finding the best resources for my readers, things of value that might interest you.... and if you click on these, I think I get a quarter. or something like that. It beats tap dancing on the corner.

It's all an experiment, Ill let you know how it goes.

I also added a site counter, and it's been a bit of an encouragement. All along, I thought I had 24 readers, per week. I was basing that on my polls...although this week, only 6 of you answered the question. But you know what, I have a lot more readers, most of them just dont like polls, I guess, especially polls about Iranian dictators. Well, in any case, welcome, Im glad you are here.

The site counter has a great tool, it lists where the readers are from....it doesnt give out any personal info, so I dont know who the readers are, but I know where they are from. Some of them are obvious, for example, Grandma J is in Killeen Texas, so, when it lists Killeen, I got that one figured out. But I have some readers from far, far away......several in Canada, and a few in the UK, as well as one from Australia!! Who knew?

There are also readers all over the USA, from places Ive never heard of, like Ypsilanti, Michigan and Glan Burie, Maryland, which is a wonderful surprise!

Im toying with my next post...there are two that Ive been meaning to write about...one is a consumer warning, but when I read it, I laughed so hard I about peed my pants, and I dont know that my insensitive perspective on it would be welcomed. The other is truly more serious, something I stumbled upon a few weeks ago that has been haunting me....but Im not sure others would be interested, and it's a bit of a downer, althought it COULD bring awareness and help others reach out....Ill keep thinking, so please keep reading.

BTW, did anyone see Top Chef this week? I stayed up to watch, and must have fallen asleep a nano second before the said, "(So and So) pack your knives".....I woke up about 20 minutes into the repeat episode (they play it twice, consecutively here) so, I pinched myself for the next half hour, watching it AGAIN, just to see who got sent home, and apparently, fell asleep again, right before Padma spoke. CRUD. Thank Goodness for the internet, I looked it up, and Brian went home, shame....Im not that thrilled with the remaining options...Trey and Brian were my favorites.

Que sera sera.....

Im a Fashionista

Something you all should know about me, (cause it's my blog), is that, Im a Fashionista.

Yes, dont act surprised, under these 2 year old, stained maternity t-shirts, is a gal that has a passion for fashion.

And, Im more than just a mom, more than a part time working-gal, Im a versatile lady with lots of exicting things going on in my life. It's super important that I have hip and trendy outfits to wear for every occasion, so, I did some shopping.

Wanna see what I got?????

This is for when I do some dusting around the house, I just sort of shimmy against the furniture and things become sparkly and clean.



This little number is for when I go to a bull fight. Cultured women like myself attend bull fights, ya know. It's a really handy dress and allows me to attract the bull, HANDS FREE!



Sometimes when I go out, I need to be reminded and encouraged to stick to my diet. Nothing says, "dont eat fattening stuff!" quite like this ensemble. If the giant opening on the side at the hip/waist/muffin area doesnt keep me on track, the large head of lettuce on the shoulder willl serve as a reminder to "eat light."



On those days when I am in a bad mood, and while they are rare, they do happen, I can wear this. The dunce cap puts everyone on notice to leave me alone, and the hair screams, "I dont want to brush my hair"..which is the mantra of every girl deep inside.



And because Im actually a cleaning fanatic, honest, I got this, as it seems to be just what I need when spiffying up the house. It has all kinds of cloths and rags attached, so that I can just grab and scrub as I go about my day. Even the hair-do is great for cleaning between mini-blinds. How clever!



I know you are all jealous, and I cant help that, but please, dont hate me for being so in style!

Dancing Queen (and King)

One of the purest forms of laughter often comes from watching my children dance.

Pooper loves to just start shaking his rear when he hears a good beat, and sometimes, even when the beat is only playing in his head. Out of nowhere he just breaks out and starts grooving, back side rockin to and fro, doesnt matter who is around. He first learned how to do the "booty dance" from a commercial that aired on tv promoting a local radio station. The DJ, Rick Dees, along with lots of other people, would shake their bottom, for the entire commercial. Andrew loved dancing along, and it's now become a habit.

I couldnt find the actual commercial, but here is a tribute that some fans of the radio station made;

booty dance tribute

And this video is of a little boy, watching the commercial, apparently it is his favorite too;
little guy dancing away

The funniest thing, is to get Beauty dancing. Not long ago, I realized that if I started dancing, she would copy me. So, sometimes in the car, when Im bored, I like to nonchalantly do a few moves, and it never fails, as I spy on her in the rear view mirror, she copies me.

I pretend that I am intensley focused on the road, while I do some big lasso circles with my arms (one arm at a time, of course, I am driving after all.) I shake my hands in the air, to the side, roll my shoulders, I try to be a bit kooky about it. I never let her see that I am looking in the rear view mirror, I have to sneak my peaks. But sure enough, no matter what I do, there she is, following along.

I suggest that those of you with young kids try this, if you havent already, it's really a hoot.

Here is another little thing that took place around here recently, a conversation between My Honey and Beauty, it really gave me a laugh;

My Honey: (as we were driving to church) I had a weird dream last night, and we were all visiting the moon (ok, honestly, I tuned out at this point, cause, how weird is that? but he went on to tell about what we all were doing.....)

Beauty: Oh yeah, I remember that.

My Honey: Beauty, I DREAMED we did that.

Beauty: But Dad, I was there, remember?

She's got a point!

I'm bringing sexy back!

Well, I cant say that I am bringing it back, Im just writing about it, and....I dont think "sexy" is the right word, in fact, it's pretty far from sexy, it's about as sexy as John Mark Karr in a whale tale ....and now Ive gone and made my self nauseous just writing that!

But my readers (all 24 of you) asked for it, and dont let it ever be said that I didnt keep my people satisfied...so here it is, a public service announcement, complete with pictures!

I want you all to know too, that this did not come easy. I have spent the past few days, trying to get a shot, and when the guy was finally there, I would slow down for the photo op, and my dilapidated camera would either malfunction or run out of batteries (it burns up batteries quicker than lightning!) And when I finally, FINALLY, did get the shots, I brought them home to the computer and the mouse broke. Yep, the mouse suddenly became spastic and I couldnt navigate myself to even open up the pics. It was like the devil himself was keeping me from sharing this with all of you. But I scavenged the house and found a new mouse, actually our old broken mouse, which thankfully works better than the current broken mouse, and so here we are.

And, before I post anything that might get ME on the police blotter, I want to remind everyone that Im not using names, and it's nothing to go calling lawyers about, Im just trying to give people a better understanding of the situation, so that they can act accordingly, (ie. dont walk the trail without a can of mace or a bottle of wine - whichever you choose.)

So, there is one long trail that goes in a loop around our community. Sometimes it follows along a marshy creek, other times, as in this time, it passes in front of some homes. There are hordes of joggers, mom's pushing strollers and the occasional kid on their way to school that take this trail. It is very well travelled.

Apparently, someone, a nameless one, likes to park himself in a chair, right along this path. As Ive said before, I cant say I blame him, no need spending your retirement in a bingo hall in some dusty old town (eh hem, Grandma J.) I think it's best to get out, get some fresh air, go where the people are...that's the best way to stay young. But for heaven's sake, dont go asking people to fornicate with you! For one thing, you dont know where these trail walkers have been, and for two, it's not polite to do that kinda thing on the first meeting, and three, are you really up for that? is Viagra that powerful?

Back to being a busy little path, here is a snapshot of a gal just minding her own business. I am pretty sure that gramps was getting all reved up at this point, watching that blond pony tail swing back and forth as his lady got closer and closer, he was probably rehearsing his lines as she approached, "hey, wanna play doctor?" no, no, no, that's too sassy....."hi there, let's have sex." too forward, gotta be more debonair, "can I get you a glass a wine and a pillow?" I just hope the poor gal had on her running shoes! (if you look close, you can see him up ahead, sitting in his chair.)



It was important to me to get a nice good picture, for all of you, you know, just to make sure that we were providing the best possible information. So, I slowed, cause I didnt want to post a big blur, and I had to almost stop, and I think the guy thought I might be hankering up to proposition him. He looked right at me as I snapped the picture.




and then I sped away, afraid that I would look like the perv, taking pictures of strangers on the side of the road, heck, I feared the jogger herself might even call me in for suspicious activity.

I was bummed I wasnt able to get a close up. Not sure how I could have, except to get out and spark up a conversation with the ole guy, and maybe tell him I had just the girl for him, but would need his picture, or something (and you know I would have done it!!) but the jogger had me nervous, not to mention the look on the guy's face....and because Im generous, I tried to crop a closer look of that handsome face for all of you to drool over.....




hopefully nobody recognizes him as their long last uncle.

Im not too sure how much longer he will keep up this hobby, as I noticed his house was up for sale, and, not to be crass, but he's no spring chicken either, so one way or another, I doubt his gig will continue too long.

For those single ladies, interested in finding a spunky one, better get here soon. The rest of you, just stick to the treadmill at the gym.

PS. I just stumbled upon something so ridiculous, that I had to post it...but it's too trashy to post on here, so Ill send the brave over to TMZ to check it out. Maybe some one should get this as a present for gramps!

Blogging 101

What is blogging? Why do people blog? Some of you may be asking questions about blogging, so I thought I would try to give you a quick lesson. It's really not going to be a Blogging 101, maybe more like, Remedial Blogging, as Im not really qualified to do a 101 level post, since Im just learning all of this myself.

But let me show you a bit of what I have come to know in this Blogging World.

The first time I heard of blogs, it was through political blogs, people espousing their own views on issues such as immigration, church vs. state controversies, and campaign announcements. Some of you might know that before I had kids I liked to dabble in politics, just for fun, although briefly for money, mostly for the excitement.

Some of my favorite political blogs are; John's blog ... a guy I knew in the circle of things, who still is very active in the going's on of our county. I also like this local political blog And of course, there are other blogs, like that of Arianna Huffington, but I wouldnt never link to her site...for reasons that I might one day detail here, but suffice it to say she has bad breath, I mean REALLY monster breath, and when someone with monster breath is yelling at you, within an inch of your face, being held back by body guards, it's not pretty. But anyways.

I dont have the time to dabble much anymore, or read those blogs as often as I would like, but they were my first introduction to the blogging world.

When Pooper was sick, I started his website and soon become absorbed in the websites of friends, near and far, that were embattled in the fight against childhood cancer. I wrote often, and read even more, and journaling became an important outlet for me, as reading about the lives of others did too. I still read those blogs, and pray for those in the midst of battle, such as Christian's site and Alexia's page and I still go to leave encouraging words and prayers to the families that lost their children too soon, like Gregory's Family and Cam's Family.

Now that Pooper has finished treatment, I still keep journaling on his website, but My Honey let me know that I was too often writing about my own stuff, instead of Poopers. Basically, he thought I was hijacking Pooper's site for my own use. I didnt want to stop my writing, it had become a good habit, a therapeutic outlet, and God knows I might crumble or have spastic road rage episodes if I were to stop, so I didnt stop. I just kept going, albeit on this site, instead of Poopers.

I know a few other "cancer moms" that started their own sites, like Kristie and Marey, and they seemed to have transitioned nicely, so I thought I would try it as well.

So here I am, now where was I? Oh yeah, I was gonna give you some info about blogging.....

I have found that there is a great big world of bloggers. And my favorites are not serious, or focused, like political blogs. My favorites are rather random ramblings, by regular folks, dealing with real life. The blogs I like most are the Seinfelds of their day, writing about nothing in particular, which actually becomes quite entertaining. Im not gonna list my favorites now, because you would click on the links to read them, and probably never come back.

But guess what I else I found? These blogs, werent just of interest to me, reading them seems to be getting quite popular.

Take for instance, Pioneer Woman. When I checked in on her blog today, she had nearly 1500 comments!! That is for one day's post. That is 1000 times more comments than I got today. It might have something to do with her contest, where she is giving away a $600 gift certificate to JC Penneys (she does fun stuff like contests)...but whatever, she still has a lot of readers, and that is impressive, especially since she writes about things like her retarded brother and her cowboy husband, really.

Many bloggers have developed an online circle of friends. I found this to happen when I wrote Poopers page, and some of those people have become very close to me, even if I havent met them in person.

Almost as fun to read as the blog itself, is the comment section of some blogs, with people chatting back and forth, having fun, and often espousing some of the funniest things in print.

Yes, blogging has become popular and there are even the "cool" bloggers. I guess it's like the "in crowd" in high school, except for people in blogland are nice and not caddy....but there are clearly those bloggers that have a following, and have become celebrities of sorts.

Take for instance, BOSSY. Bossy is one of the popular girls, and well, guess what happened today? She signed my guestbook! I kind of asked her to, so, you know, it wasnt spontaneous, but it's kind of like walking down the math hall and having the Homecoming King stop to talk to you, except she is a girl, and we arent in high school, but you know what I mean.

There seems to be a circle of writers, who have become so popular, that they have paid ads on their site, which brings them a little bit of income, which is something to drool over. And some even write for different parenting magazines and online sites, drawing them into the professional realm of writing.

Despite the fact that some are paid, I find my favorite bloggers to be down-to-earth, writing about real life, the good and the bad, and I guess that is what makes them so well liked. We all like to know that we are not alone, that other people go through the same things, feel the same way, and live crazy lives that are very different than those scripted in the media.

Now, Ill give you the links to some favorites, located at the bottom of the page; go and enjoy, just make sure you come back.

PS. For those awaiting the next installment of the old man in the chair...I am working on it. I tried to get pictures twice this week, but my camera failed (long story, of course)...but check back in, Ill have all the goods soon!

Video killed the radio star

Last week, my kids discovered something comparable to an all-the-ice-cream-you-can-eat buffet. They realized that you can play Radio Disney on our cable TV. That's right, you can listen to Hannah M. and the HSM Gang all the time, IN THE HOUSE.

You see, up until now, my kids only get to hear Radio Disney in the car, when their dad drives. Their dad is nice, and will play any kid DVD, CD or radio station, all they need to do is ask. Actually, they probably dont even have to ask, he probably offers. Their mom, on the other hand, feels very strongly, that the driver must thoroughly enjoy the music pulsing through the speakers, and as much as she might like to let the kids listen to THEIR music, it would, quite honestly, be a safety hazard, because to drive the car while being annoyed can be a dangerous situation.

Somehow recently, while stumbling through the cable channels on TV, Pooper spotted Radio Disney. That's channel 940. Im not sure what he was doing in the 900's, but he was, call it a special gift from God, but he found it.

Ever since, they have not only been listening to the music, but have been obsessed with requesting songs.

Pooper was probably unfairly set up, as he is used to Radio Lollipop, the in-house radio station at the hospital. He can call up and talk to the DJ any time, request whatever song he wants, heck, he has even been able to go down and help DJ. I dont think he quite gets that a bazillion other kids are trying to call Radio Disney, it's a tad more popular than Radio Lollipop.

But he still tries to call, and he gets Beauty squeeling with excitement as they discuss which song to request, Jonas Brothers or Troy.

They havent quite figured out how to call, hang up and hit redial, but they are fumbling their way around, hoping to get their songs on the air (as if they arent already repeating the same handful of songs over and over.)

The other day, they hit the jackpot on things to obsess about, Radio Disney contests! Yep, that's right, caller number this or that can win tickets to here or there, all you have to do is call! Woo hoo! They ran around, frantically, trying to dial the number, over and over. They were so busy trying to get through in the mornings that they had a hard time getting dressed for school.

The whole thing took me back to the 7th grade, back when I attended my first concert, live and without parents. I wont tell you which concert, but would love to see if someone can guess the right answer! (and yes mom, you can play, cause I dont think you will know the right answer!)

The local radio station was giving away tickets, and I was determined to win them. I remember listening one morning in particular, as I was ironing my, eh hem, light blue satin jacket. And, now that I think about it, are you supposed to iron satin?? Anyways, I was ironing, and they announced it was time to call, so I ran to get the phone, and did my dial, hang up and dial again frenzy (that was before *redial* was invented).

In the end, I didnt get through. I was disappointed, but became even more upset when I returned to find that I had left the iron, face down, on my jacket. My jacket that now had brown dots from where the iron had burned the satin. Crud!

Not only that, but when I arrived to school that day, girls were buzzing around BW. BW didnt typically have a lot of BUZZ around her...she was sort of shy, and had a full neck brace (think Joan Cusack in Sixteen Candles.) But this morning, everyone was her BEST FRIEND, as, you guessed it, she had won the radio contest; 2 tickets to the concert. Just an FYI, she ended up taking her dad, not a "new" friend, but that's beside the point.

Yes, radio contests, a guess they are a part of childhood, but so soon? I was in Jr. High when I dialed in. My kids are only 4 and 6, that just seems way too soon to be hyped up to call in on the radio....but alas, it wont last forever. This special new found joy is not meant to be. Our cable channel announced that tomorrow is the last day that Radio Disney will be broadcast on the TV, so the kids are going to have to stick to listening while riding in the car with dad, phoneless.

He's Baaaack!

Well, apparently, he never really went away.

Let me explain.

I have noticed recently, when driving the kids to school (the school is in our neighborhood, but I have found 153 reasons why I need to drive, rather than walk.)...anyways, I have noticed a lawn chair, the old kind, with the aluminum frame and straight back....a lawn chair placed on the side walk. It's there every day. Empty. Until Tuesday morning.

Tuesday morning, there was a man in the chair. An old guy. I didnt think much of it...at first.

Earlier this week, I was looking at the police blotter online (we had heard loud sirens the night before, and a neighbor said there were several fire trucks and ambulances....) so I wanted to see what had happened. It turns out the emergency vehicles were going to a false alarm, but something else caught my eye....it was this:

[09/06/2007 10:41:41 : DGARCIA] Cross streets: CHARDONNAY DR//VINEYARD DR NBH: 922F7 92694 33.5574856705525,-117.6395273177 INF STS SHE WAS WALKING AROUND HER RESD AND A MW,80`S,GRY SWTSHIRT,PAJAMA BOTTOM, WAS TRYING TO GRAB HER, SUBJ SITTING IN A CHAIR AT ONEAL//NARROW CYN, OCCURED 10 AGO... INF ALSO AVD SUBJ WAS PLAYING W/HIMSELF AND TRIED TO GET INF TO GO INSIDE SUBJS RESD

Seems that romantic doctor was at it again.

Then it all clicked. Like a line of dominoes suddenly falling into place, one hitting against another.....the chair, the old guy, the police blotter......IT WAS HIM.

Today, as I drove by, I saw him. Just sitting in his chair, right up at the sidewalk - the sidewalk that is the main path through our community, the side walk that perhaps children walk on to school (if there moms dont drive them.) Certainly the side walk where two athletic type gals encountered his amore.

I stared at him, as much as I could going 45 mph. Pajama bottoms, t-shirt, 80ish years old, yep, that was him. I tried to assess if he would be scary up close...would he be a physical threat? Could he grab someone? Was he strong enough?

The whole way home, I wondered what the heck he was still doing on the sidewalk. After two (that I know of, that have been reported) incidents where the police were called, hasnt someone put a kabash on him yet? Why is he allowed to sit out there?

I hope I dont see him everyday, because Im just crazy enough to obsess over this, and seeing him might provoke me to do something wild, like, take his picture and post it on here, or something like that....just to warn people.

Guy should find some other way to spend his retirement...like, move to a cowboy state and spend your days playing bingo, or something like that, but stay off the sidewalk!

Please pass the toilet paper

Ok, this is officially another reason why Im glad I started this blog, because I have another thing to rant about that wouldnt be appropriate on Pooper's site . And, since there isnt really a good way to introduce the topic, Ill just put it out there and ask, What is the deal with people having sex in public bathrooms?????

I can sort of understand if homeless people or prostitutes, or maybe trampy teens (not wanting to get caught by their parents) end up having sex in a public bathroom, maybe. I mean, they probably dont have any place else, and while I would just go celibate, I do *understand* that some might just forego good manners and use a stall. A stall at a really nice restaurant or at the mall (they have nice couches in the women's bathrooms at the mall, like at Nordstroms where they have fresh flowers at the sink) or you know, places that have soap, and towels, and semi-clean floors.

But I really dont get it when rich people, people who can afford to rent a room, use airport and beach bathrooms. Are these not the most disgusting places possible to have sex? The smell alone is enough to get you, not to mention the high volume of traffic and less than romantic decor. I mean, the beach (ehem, George Michael) I can barely even walk into a beach bathroom without gagging, it's like walking into a public sewer drain, not most people's idea of "setting the mood." And now this Senator, for goodness sakes, were there no better options for this guy? He has money, power, influence, and he looks for a good time by trying to pick up a guy in the stall next to him at the airport???

What ever happend to an upscale escort service, or -here's a wild idea- meeting someone in a bar. Obviously these guys werent looking for love or an intellectually stimulating relationship, heck, the Senator never even saw the face of his target, but you would think that they would have the resources and opportunity to do a little bit better than a public bathroom.

Ive been known to wave my hand underneath the neighboring stall, never knew that was a *sign*. Good thing I always clarify my intentions by saying, "excuse me, do you have any toilet paper to spare?"

the suburban version of Cops, or, Reno 911

Sometimes, just for fun, or perhaps to escape the goings-on of my own life, I like to read the local police blotter. It lists all the calls that come into the dispatcher, as well as a bit of information about what happened. In a typical week, we’ll have a few complaints about pesty skateboarding kids, a few false burglar alarms, and maybe a call from someone complaining that their neighbors are yelling or having a loud party. Kinda boring. I’ve yet to read anything as dramatic as the time when I was single, and I thought there was an intruder in my home, and the police sent the helicopter and the cops rushed in my house…..nope, nothing like that around here. Just, simple stuff. But, I still like to read it, ‘cause you never know when something like this might show up:

[08/15/2007 11:00:24 : SIEGLERSD] [Cleared with unit 286] [08/15/2007 10:47:45 : SIEGLERSD] Unit : 286 C4 10-6 [08/15/2007 10:43:38 : 285 ] c-4 [08/15/2007 10:04:25 : BBLOCKLEVINE] ONEILL // DORRANCE 925 E1 PC ON ONEILL BTWN DORRANCE AND NARROW CANYON FOR A MW 70`S SITTING IN A BEACH CHAIR IN HIS PJS DRINKING ~MERLOT~..INF WAS JOGGING BY WHEN SUBJ ASKED INF IF SHE WANTED TO HAVE SEX AND AND OTHER RELATED ACTIVITIES..SUBJ ALSO TOLD INF HE WAS A DOCTOR....INF LAST SAW SUBJ 10 AGO

Once you get past the formal police codes (10-4 good buddy) and into the meat of the call, it begins to paint a picture…..

Kindly, retired doctor, just looking to enjoy life, yet with not a whole lot to do (he is retired most likely, since it says he is in his 70’s) decides to kick back and relax, in his beach chair, with a glass of Merlot, and since retired people aren’t tied down by the fast paced life the working folks deal with, the guy decided to stay comfy and remain in his pajamas. Now, according to the info, this all took place at 11:00am. So, Ive got the picture of the guy, relaxing, sipping his wine, in his pjs, reclined in a beach chair…… one tid bit that is interesting, is that the location, is on the busiest street in the community. The speed limit is 50, and people often go much faster, so, not sure why he selected that spot, doesn’t seem to fit the laid back mood that he seems to be trying to achieve, but ok, maybe he’s a nascar fan and likes fast cars. So, there he is, just enjoying the good life. Guy probably worked hard as a doctor, all those years of grueling medical school and 24 hour shifts doing his residency, and then dealing with the rigors of being a physician and caring for people, saving lives, no doubt, the guy deserves a little R & R. So, it’s really no wonder, that while sitting there, soaking in a bit of the Southern California sun, watching a female jogger run by (informant) that he decides to ask her out, on a sort of date, kind of. She apparently got a bit flustered by it, and turned him down. Bet he’s not used to that, being a doctor and all. Kind of feel sorry for him, seems to be losing his touch in his old age.

And then, there is this one:

[08/20/2007 19:29:12 : HOVDEBM] [Cleared with unit 389] [08/20/2007 19:16:17 : HOVDEBM] Unit : 389 C4 [08/20/2007 18:36:51 : HOVDEBM] Unit : 389 HAVE THE SUBJ DET IN FRONT OF OC DIAGNOSTIC [08/20/2007 18:29:49 : ASWANSON] VEH PARKED IN FRONT OF THE 10-20 GIVEN [08/20/2007 18:29:30 : ASWANSON] NO MAKE [08/20/2007 18:29:10 : ASWANSON] Cross streets: TERRACE RD//WINDMILL AV NBH: 922G7 92694 33.557856754532,-117.62915029401 SILV TOY TACOMA PLT ....MW SANDY BLONDE HAIR 5`8 MED BUILD WHI 24 HR FITNESS SHIRT BLU SWEAT PANTS APPROACHING PEOPLE...SAYING HE IS BEING FOLLOWED BY THE CIA...UNDER SURVEILLANCE BY THE FBI AND THAT WE ARE UNDER WAR, ETC....NFD...INF IS NOT 10-23

The location here, is in our business area, across the street from the homes. I noticed that he is wearing fitness garb, and indeed, the mentioned gym is in that area, so I imagine, he was working out, and as many people do when exercising, he was probably doing some deep thinking. Perhaps contemplating his personal life, or doing some existential wonderings, and I guess he also thought about the state of our world today. Apparently the war in the Middle East must have been at the forefront of his mind. The guy is young, probably still idealistic in his thinking, and it seems to me, this caring guy was just trying to be helpful, a good Samaritan of sorts. It looks as if he was just trying to let others know about the war, you know, in case they have been locked in a basement for 4 years, and hadn’t heard the news. Maybe he even tried to start an intellectual conversation with the informant, but in any case, this intellectual was taken the wrong way, and got someone freaked out. Guess the lesson there is to not talk to strangers, you never know how they are going to take you. Like, you can say, “That’s a nice dress you have on.” And be mistaken for a robber, and someone can call the cops and say you wanted to steal their dress…you never know, so, best not to talk to strangers, especially when you are having paranoid delusions.

If nothing else, the police blotter gives me great insight into how people think, and what they do. You can even get some great ideas for how to spend your free time, if you have any, like, if you are retired (cough, cough, Grandma J)….

Do any of you read your community police blotter? Have you ever been on there yourself? If you have a good incident to share, pass it along, we could all use a good read.

Are we all in this together?

Earlier this week, I was startled awake in the early morning hours (early morning being 7am, just to clarify.) I was confused by my fugue state and for split seconds thought that we were having a home invasion by Hanson, The Jackson 5, Donny Osmond and the cast from Grease (the original soundtrack cast.) The music was blaring, and I couldn’t quite make out the words, but I could hear my daughter shrieking over the thumping of the bass.

I quickly stumbled out of bed, mumbling to myself, “must-save-children-hurry-downstairs.” But as I got closer to the staircase, the music became much clearer and I realized that my kids were having their own High School Musical concert in the playroom.

Now, we have a rule in our house, the volume is not to exceed # 15 on the TV, but I frequently find that my kids have upped it into the 20’s. On this morning, however, they had cranked it into the 40’s.

As I swung into the room, angry that they had so selfishly disturbed my slumber, I was fully prepared to ban them from all things related to the tv, music, and anything else enjoyable. Before I could utter a word (not that they would have heard me anyways) I caught a glimpse of Pooper doing hand motions while he sang, “keep your head in the game, keep your head in the game.” And Beauty was shimmying, head tossed back, singing (and I use that term loosely) from the deepest parts of her diaphragm.

I stopped and watched, my anger melted to amusement, and some weird sense of pride. Pride that my kids were growing up, normally, developing their own sense of self (as much as one can in our media age where HSM is jammed down their throats.)

Tiptoeing out of the room, I decided to let them enjoy this childhood moment.

Little did I know that this same scenario would replay over and over again, basically non-stop throughout the week. They even played, “music videos” with their neighborhood friends, blaring the High School Musical soundtrack from the porch, dancing along with their McDonalds Happy Meal/American Idol “microphones” in their hands.

Now, I like the music to HSM, it’s definitely easier on the ears than Barney, or The Doodlebops. But believe it or not, there is a limit.

Just when I thought my head might explode and spastic high schoolers might pop out singing, we reached the amazing crescendo of the HSM phenomenon. The TV premiere of High School Musical 2. My kids were so worked up about watching it Friday night, so I let them stay up late and watch it.

When it was over, Pooper remarked, “It wasn’t the same as the first one.” Um, yeah, it wasn’t the first one, it was a different story, with the same kids, and very similar music, and to be honest, an eerily familiar story line. Boy likes girl, different rich girl likes boy, different rich girl tries to win boy over, but in the end, boy connects with the original girl, and it’s true love, and then unicorns and ponies fly out of everyone’s ears.

When it was all over, I felt quite satisfied, that the HSM obsession was now complete, and we could move on with life.

Until tonight. When my kids informed me, that the Disney Channel, never ones to pass up a good opportunity for overkill, was having a High School Musical 2 sing-a-long. They wanted me to go to wwwdotdisneydotcombackslashhighschoolmusical2 and print off the lyrics, so that they could “sing along” tonight.

I thought I was going to choke on my own breath. WHAT? Aren’t we done with HSM2? We listened to HSM1 all week, then had the grand finale with the premiere of HSM2, and I even promised to get you all the CD for Christmas (far enough away that they might forget) and now we have to hear it all over again, via some commercialized karaoke night?

So, Im signing off, as the printing is done, and Im going to go hand the kids the lyric sheets, and sit and watch them, and maybe sing along, but definitely be in awe of how grown up they have become. And then Ill throw up.

and the winner is.......katie!

First, thanks for playing, it was fun to read the different questions and ponder over the answers.....and Ill tell you that it was much harder than I imagined, to pick a winner. I thought about it all last night, and couldnt decide.

They all had me going back and forth having discussions with myself, trying to choose my own answers;

grandma j's (and yes, relatives are allowed to play) was easy...I go for laces, usually. It's good practice for the kids, although annoying for me to see straggling strings, getting all worn and dirty trailing my kidlets, but overall, It's important for the kids to practice tying. However, if after an hour at the store the shoe that fits is velcro, fine, but I prefer the kids in laces. Thankfully, Beauty, although only 4, is one heck of a shoelace tier. Pooper, nearly 7, will probably never learn to tie them (fine motor damage) but with his little sister to help him out, that takes the pressure off of me to be his only tier. So, that one was settled quickly in my mind. (disclaimer, I dont know how to conjugate the word "tie", but you all know what I mean.)

m, ms. r., mom, auntie m. marey really got me thinking.....Im not opposed to homework that they can do independently, and the family projects actually sound fun, but in the end, Id say to give the kids a break. I believe unstructured free play allows for some of the best learning, and want to make sure that kids have time to let their imaginations run wild. Obviously the homework that requires parental assistance is out, because Im already stretched thin, and Im lazy.

josiek and the mrs. both had my mind going down the same path....how would I spend my free time once the kids were in school....

Well, josie, once the kids are in school, I would like to get my toes done, mostly because I am currently way past due, walking around with those scratchy, cracked heals, and the tips of my toenails have had the polish scraped off and the little white edges are screaming, "Paint me!", so that would be my gut instinct. Although, truthfully, between the 3 kids and 2 schools, life will be even more hectic than it is now, being the family taxi. So if I do get some time, Ill probably be too pooped out to actually get my toes done, and will probably cuddle up on the coach with some bon bons (or, Ben and Jerry's coffee heath bar crunch) and watch tv (Im a news junkie, so instead of soaps, Nancy Grace or FOX.)

the mrs. had some fabulous ideas, and I think I actually went into a mini-funk realizing as much as I want to, Ill never get to do all of her relaxing options. Shopping is out, because Im plus-sized, and hate plus-size clothes, so I choose to just continue to wear old, stained maternity t-shirts rather than buy new plus sized clothes (Im nothing if not practical.) The day of beauty sounds so wonderful, and would beat out the nap, mostly because the day of beauty includes a massage, which is like a nap with perks. Lunch with friends would be marvelous, and it made me wonder when the last time was that I had lunch with good friends and no kids, and my mind went blank, because, yes, it's really been that long.

As my brain melted contemplating josiek and the mrs's ideas, it led me to some clarity, and finally it hit me, which one to choose;

You see, I have gotten some feedback about my last polls, from readers that said the polls didnt pertain to them, because they didnt have young children, or they were working moms, and my polls have thus far been about staying at home or kidlets.

So, that narrowed the entries down, to Katie's and the mrs.'s. And it was tough. Now, I know that the mrs.'s poll could be answered by anyone, but there was the "no housework" phrase, and I could just hear the working moms sighing, "we dont do housework, we have jobs." and excising themselves from the pack.

So, Katie became the natural, inclusive winner..not to mention that her options had me contemplating bringing my chocolate fountain (Christmas 2005 gift from the kids) into my bed. I wonder if my mattress would provide enough stability, maybe if I placed the fountain on a big, thick book...I could manage to prop up in bed, with a tray of goodies; marshmallows, pretzels, maybe even some fruit, just to make me think Im being healthy, and relax in my bed while enjoying the delights of the cascading chocolate.......yeah, who say's Im thinking.

Congratulations Katie! Email me @ kim.sprague@cox.net I cant actually email you, because when I click on your email it takes me to yahoo (problem with my computer settings that I need My Honey to fix)...because I dont have yahoo...so, please email me with your address and Ill send you your Starbucks gift card.

Ok, not that anyone wanted to hear my choices, but there you go, and now Id love to hear yours....

Getting to know you

When I started this blog, I was excited to be able to include polls. Why polls? glad you asked. I think it's a fun way to get to know each other. There has been such an explosion in blogging and connecting online, but yet, we are all still strangers. Every day I read some of my favorite blogs, and sometimes feel like I really KNOW the writer. All comfortable in my ergonomical chair, conversing with my computer monitor, laughing out loud and shouting "you-go-girls", as if, the blog author were sitting in front of me. But see, they dont know who I am. And, I dont know who some of you are, and, well, that takes this whole "connectedness" thing and makes it a bit cold, and impersonal. How ironic, to be sharing what's inside our brain, all of the little idiosyncracies of life, things that are typically reserved for our best girl friends, and have it be with strangers.

So, I thought polls were a great, "getting to know you" kind of a tool. Something informal, kinda fun, a way to see glimpses of each other.

And, I want you to be a part of it. So, now is your chance to suggest a poll question.

It should have a question, and at least 3 response options. Ill pick a winner and post it up as our weekly poll tomorrow morning.

It's a contest, and the winner will get a Starbucks gift card. So, put your entry in the guestbook, make sure it has your name or email so I can contact you.

It starts NOW and will end promptly at 8pm PST.

Ready.....GO!

one foot, two foot, red foot, blue foot

What is the deal with my kids and their shoes?

When you enter my house, you will be welcomed by a large stack of shoes. I thought I would make life simple and have my kids take their shoes off at the door. Most people think I do that to keep our floors nice, and guest often ask politely, "oh, would you like me to take off my shoes?" The answer is, no need. The floors are already a mess, I just have my kids take their shoes off at the door in an effort to try to keep them from losing their shoes.

If they keep their shoes on, they will end up coming off at somepoint; bathroom, bedroom, living room, while playing, or maybe even in the kitchen, and then all chances of keeping the shoes together are gone for good. Im not sure why this is, but once the shoes come off, it's like the left shoe tries to run from the right shoe, and they are rarely seen together again. So, let's just keep it simple and keep all shoes at the door, right? Wrong!

While getting ready to leave for Pooper's swim meet championships this weekend, at 6am, I might add, Beauty could not find her shoes. I take that back, she could find plenty of shoes, just not a matching pair. She had a white flip flop in the play room and a pink one in her bedroom. There was a white tennis shoe in the hall, yet we couldnt find either pink tennis shoe. We took apart the house, the car, and eventually, after 20 minutes and risk of missing the championships all together, we found her nice church shoes in her closet. So, off to the swimmeet in her shorts and nice church shoes, aye!

I must have said a hundred times in complete frustration, "In our family , we keep our shoes by the door! How many times do I have to tell you to keep your shoes by the door? If you would just listen to me, you would know where your shoes are, and that would be, by the door! For goodness sakes, I realize that it's in your blood to do the opposite of everything I say, but trust me when I tell you to put your gosh danged shoes BY THE DOOR!" I say that often, and say it loudly when we are on our way out of the house, because naturally, one of my kidlets always whimpers, "I cant find my other shoe."

Im not sure how much easier I can make it. Perhaps it's a good time to pull out our Colombian Family to remind the kids that they should be so thankful that they have shoes, as their Latin siblings dont even get any, and they should cherish and protect and PUT BY THE DOOR their shoes!

Or, maybe I can input powerful magnets into the soles, or gps tracking devices. It's almost as if my house is the Bermuda Triangle for shoes.

In any case, with school and soccer beginning soon, and Little One starting to walk, Im going to be making a trip to the shoe store this week. The new pairs will exponentially increase the number of times that someone will not be able to find their matched footwear, taking me one step closer to that inevitable nervous breakdown.

** We will have a contest tomorrow!! Check back in tomorrow morning and you will have one day to submit your entry for the next poll question. All entries should be posted into the guestbook. If there are duplicates of the same question, the first person to enter it gets the prize, so come back early. The contest starts sharply at 8am Tuesday morning and will finish at 8pm Tuesday night, pacific standard time. The prize is a Starbucks gift card (mom, I know it's not quite as exciting as Pioneer Woman's prizes, but it still makes it fun.) I will post the winner along with the new poll on Wednesday morning**

That's one more point for me

Halleluiah, there’s hope!

Have you heard the news? Baby Einstein doesn’t make your kids smarter, in fact, it makes them dumber! This is a huge relief to me, and it means my kids might have a shot at things in life.

I remember when Baby Einstein was all the rage. Whenever I visited with a mommy friend, she would inevitably have Baby Einstein (or Baby Mozart, or Monet) on with her baby propped up in front of the tv so that it couldn’t help but stare at the mobiles and toys and shapes accompanied by classical music. Everyone said it would make kids smarter, and more beautiful, and better behaved. They would talk sooner, be adept at foreign languages and math, it was really the thing to do if you wanted your child to succeed. I always felt guilty, like my kidlets would end up special ed, because I didn’t take the extra time to do all that fancy stuff like have them watch Baby Einstein, or put black and white patterns up in their crib.

I did try it. I got a Baby Einstein video as a gift when Pooper was born. I remember putting his car seat in front of the tv while it played. I kept waiting for him to do something remarkable, as if to show me immediate results from this intelligence producing program….but it never happened. He mostly slept. And I gave up.

Now just this week, I read that the whole thing is not what it’s cracked up to be. AND, to boot, (and here’s where I get a twinge of the, “na-na-na-na-na” ‘s) for each hour kids watched that stuff, they scored lower on verbal tests.

It makes sense. In the olden days, “experts” said to talk to your kids, don’t worry that you look like a fool in the grocery store having conversations with an infant, “yes, that’s the veggies, can you say veggies, veg-gies, yum!” Exposure to language was supposed to stimulate the brain, producing young talkers, which also was correlated to doing all kinds of things ahead of schedule.

Then some lady invented the Baby Einstein idea, that basically said, “don’t talk to your kids, just show them inanimate objects to music.” Come on, that doesn’t really make sense, how can they learn language if we don’t talk to them? See, I knew it all along, really, I did. That’s the whole reason I never forced my kidlets to watch all those artsy videos, I was, uh, smarter than that, yeah, that’s it, I knew it would slow them down, and since I always do what’s best for my kids, I made the sacrifice to avoid all things related to the Baby Einstein phenomenon.

Whew! I feel vindicated! One more point for me, for getting through this thing called motherhood.

**Have you taken the poll? and coming soon, a contest, to see who can come up with the best poll question, stay tuned! **

A helpful parenting idea

I had a recent conversation with an old college friend, (hmmm, old? Yes, I guess it’s safe to say we are “old friends”…not that we ourselves are old, but our friendship is old, 20+ years, and, well, I guess that makes us old too.) but anyways, we were chatting about our lives, our kids, and parenting.

This particular pal has one boy, a year old, and, since Im OLDER and have three kids, that in some ways makes me wiser, or at least more ready to pull my hair out. I think my friend looks up to me, since she is in the thick of the “first time mom” thing , and I have so much fantastic advice. Like the time she was on a little vacation with her son, and she almost had to cut it short because he wasn’t sleeping in new and unfamiliar places. His lack of sleep kept them both up all night, and him crying and fussing all day, which made the trip nearly unbearable.

I was happy to share with her my favorite traveling companion, Benadryl. “Don’t cut your vacation short!” I told her, “Just give him Benadryl at night and it will get him right back on schedule.” It’s also handy for long plane flights, and well, sometimes nights at home when your kids are a bit out of wack.

But back to this recent chat, I expounded to her on the benefits of charity and how much it teaches our children when we give to those less fortunate. Let me explain.

When Pooper was an infant, My Honey and I decided to sponsor a child through World Vision It’s a great organization, and for very few dollars, you can help provide food, clothes, an education and Christian training to a child in a 3rd world country. We selected a boy, Pooper’s age, and we chose the country of Colombia, as My Honey was born there. When my daughters were born, we selected a baby girl each time, also from Colombia. It has been a great experience, and we frequently get photos of the children and sometimes letters and artwork. Our refrigerator door has a section for our “Colombian Family”, and my kids know all about their “brother and sisters.”

Ill admit the reason we started with this charity is because we thought it would help the children from World Vision. In actuality, it has been really good for my children, and well most of all it has been a fantastic parenting tool for me.

Case in point. Beauty’s eyes are bigger than her tummy, and she often has me make her a snack, and then is “finished” after a bite or two, leaving a whole plate of food to go to waste. Now, back in my day, my mom would rant about starving children in Africa who didn’t have any food, and I really didn’t make the connection, Id think, “go ahead and mail them my peas, please!” But I have what my mother never had, a real, live, Colombian family on my fridge.

I reference them often with things like, “You have the nerve to cry about not watching Sponge Bob? Do you realize your Colombian brother doesn’t even have a TV? Heck, he doesn’t barely have a house, he lives in a cardboard box with no lights or water, and you are crying about a TV show?” or “I don’t care if your happy meal toy broke, your Colombian sister doesn’t even have toys, and they usually don’t even have food…..and you have food and toys, so be quiet and eat!”

Really, it’s been very handy. Any time my kids start griping and complaining, which seems to be constantly, I just drag them into the kitchen to get a good look at their Colombian counterparts, wide-eyed-standing-in-the-dirt-with-mismatched-clothes-and-no-shoes HAPPY children. I remind them of their siblings that are thrilled over the rainbow when given any bit of food, even yucky stuff my kids wouldn’t touch. I tell them stories about how content these little sweeties are, and yet they never go to Chuckee Cheese or birthday parties or to a swimming pool.

Typically my kids feel a tinge of the guilt Im trying to jam down their throats, and sometimes they really get it. Once, after hollering about how they leave their toys around the house, and don’t take care of their things, when their siblings don’t even have toys….Andrew went and gathered a large box of his favorite toys, and asked me to send them to his brother.

Of course, that touched my heart, as I was able to see that learning to care about others has really been good for my kids. And I hope it’s helped the Colombian kids too.

**By the way, Blogger is having a problem with their "polls", but as soon as it's fixed Ill put up another poll, just for fun. Im thinking in the future, I might have a contest, (yes, with a prize, because my mom's favorite blogger The Pioneer Woman has contests with prizes, and my mom is always raving about them)..so I might have a contest to see who can submit the best Poll Question...so, be thinking about it, and watch to enter the contest, probably next week. ***

The sippy cup and other home science projects

Little One is now a full-fledged sippy cupper. When you consider her morning, mid-day and evening servings of milk, that means I have 3 cups a day of which to keep track. It’s not an easy thing to do. My Honey cant understand how these cups go unaccounted for, as if Little One sits in one spot all day, and I just sit there watching her, but that’s not how it goes. She doesn’t down her milk, she savors her beverages and totes her cup around with her for a bit, as she explores throughout the house. Inevitably, she drops it off in some unknown place, and it usually takes a day or two to find it again, if Im lucky, because Im such a super, awesome housekeeper. And when I finally do find it, it’s typically in some stage of fermentation, a perfect blue ribbon entry to the local science fair.

And, Ill throw in a free tip, because Im handy that way; don’t even bother washing old sippy cups, you cant get rid of the smell…better to throw them away.

Coagulated milk isn’t the only science project we have going on here….

Just this week, we have had some little friends visiting us during drives in the van, otherwise known as the, “crap mobile” The pesky little fruit flies have been multiplying exponentially each day, and each day I holler at the kids to throw away any food that they have left in the back seat. Well, this morning, I crawled into the back seat to try to find my car key that Andrew lost (whole ‘nother story) and surprise, surprise, there was a blackened banana, swarming with fruit flies. Science topic #124; decomposition.

One lesson that has been particularly emotion-laden, has been learning what living things need in order to survive. When perky children come hopping home with new plants that they sprouted in a Dixie cup at school, they place it in the sun with high hopes that it will blossom and flourish. They quickly forget that said seedling is alive, and needs water. I have one windowsill filled with school-started growths, now all brown and limp.

Recently Christine noticed that her flower was dead.

“You killed my sunflower!” she screamed, with all the high drama of a tele-novella.

And some of you may remember our fish, Kovo, we had hysterical, uncontrolled sobbing when he was discovered floating at the top of his bowl, followed by days of pomp and circumstance, which culminated with a full burial ceremony down at the beach.

Christine has been begging for a parakeet lately, does Hannah Montana have a parakeet? Someone tv idol must have one, because she got this nutty idea somewhere. I have reminded her that if we don’t have what it takes to keep a plant or fish alive, it’s best not to risk the life of a bird.

Besides, we have pets. In addition to all the other educational goings on, our house has become a full-fledged ant farm. So, we don’t need pets, we don’t need visits to the local dairy or science museum, we’ve got all 3 right here at home.

** One day left for our poll.....located at the very bottom of the page.**

Balboa Island and the Tale of the Whale

See, this blog thing is already coming in handy, because there is a little something that has come up that isnt really appropriate for Pooper's website . (which also brings up ANOTHER thing....Im not quite sure why I am now calling my family members by their nicknames, but I am, it seems very bloggerish, and so Im doing it, ,,, not that their real names arent already public info...but, whatever.)

On Saturday, we went to Balboa Island to celebrate Little One's birthday ( Pooper's site will have all the happy ramblings with photos in the morning.) I grew up nearby and have fond memories of riding my bike around, eating junk at the Fun Zone, and cruising on the ferry. I also have memories of attending events at the Tale of the Whale, which is a restaurant/banquet hall that is right on the water.....we had our swim banquet, our student government banquet, and Doug even had his School of Ministry banquet there. Yeah, seeing the Tale of the Whale had me reminiscing, but it also conjured up some more recent thoughts....Tale of the Whale, WHALE TAIL, get it??

Someone pointed out to me, recently, what a
"whale tail" really is.....

See, I cant yap about this on a kid's site!

Now, I thought the whole point of thongs was to avoid panty lines. But Im having a hard time believing that people would be self-conscious about a little rift in their pant fabric, but are perfectly fine flashing the whale tail.

The only explanation I can think of, is that at the time that thongs came into "fashion" (or whatever), high waisted pants were still in style (not that I would know anything about style, as Im still wearing high waisted pants, because the low rider style just accentuates and promotes my muffin top, whole other topic tho') So, maybe people got so used to wearing the thongs, and then the hipster pants came back, and people didnt realize that thongs+hipsters=whale tails.

Point being, it seems the whole purpose of the thongs is now null and void, so, we should probably get rid of them, and the low rider pants too. Yeah, let's just all go back to wearing our granny panties and high waisted pants, with our muffin tops getting a little extra support and nobody will need to worry about flashing whale tails.

Unless you live in Southern California and you dont have a muffin top anyways, because you are really fit, or had it suctioned out, or tucked, or whatever.....and you like being part of the ocean scenery.

**** dont forget to take part in the poll located at the very bottom of the page, Ill update them often, just for fun.

And baby makes 3....plus a bunch of other stuff

Recently, My Honey and I took the kids out to eat, at a real restaurant, the kind with menus and waitresses. We had cuddled into our booth and the kids were struggling with each other over the chips and guacamole, and as they pulled it back and forth across the table, their whining seemed to fade as THEY walked in. THEY being a young couple with their little Princess.

Oh boy, "first-time-parent-alert" I said. The strong daddy had her car seat in one hand, while he carried her sippy cup and blankey in the other. The mommy was not far behind, with her GIANT designer diaper bag and a puffy, floral, high chair cover. The sweet hostess was even part of the mix, as she was bringing along a second tote.

It was an extravagent set up, as mommy covered the dingy high chair with the soft, pink hibiscus quilt, and daddy started pulling things out of the bag; a table tray, plastic bowl and spoon, bib, some toys and a baggie of o-shaped snacks. They put little Princess in and belted her in securely. I sat mesmerized at the whole show, while my Little One stood in her high chair, shovelling fists of guacamole into her mouth.

My Honey noted, "One day they'll go out with just an extra diaper in their back pocket."

I've never gotten into the whole boutique-style-baby thing. It's a lot of work. I can barely remember to get my kids out of the car, let alone all their garb and gadgets. So, I have to chuckle as I come across the first time moms that go the extra mile regarding baby care and comfort.

Im sure one day my kids will be in therapy, with their damaged self-esteems, because I allowed them to eat food off the ground and risked their lives in metal grocery carts. It's not that I dont love them, or want the best for them, it's just that I cant do it all, I couldnt with one, and I definitely cant with three! (can you imagine what I'd have to bring to a restaurant for 3?? and they dont make quilted covers for the grocery carts with plastic cars on the fronts.)

We finished up dinner, and headed on home, full, happy, and with seat belts.